So, yesterday was just a normal night in the O'Neill house. Trying to get a sneaky little 3 year old to bed while she's doing everything she can to stall. It can be a little bit...er...unpleasant for a mother most nights. This night, it was another potty stop before bed, which usually takes at least 10 minutes...pee or no pee, we're still looking at a 10 minute stint on the potty. So, in my impatience and exasperation, I just sat on the floor with a huff. And that's when a beautiful dialogue began.
Veda, pointing at my shoulder: "Mama, are you gonna wash your tattoo off before you go to bed?"
me: "No baby, it never comes off. It will be there forever and ever! Scratch it real hard and see."
She scratches...too hard. I cringe. She giggles.
Veda: "How come it doesn't come off?"
me: "Because I want it to be there forever and ever!"
Veda: "Is that your Siwwy tattoo?"
me: "Yep, it's my tattoo for Siwwy."
Veda: "Why don't you want it to come off?"
me: "Because I want to be able to look at it every day and think of Uncle Siwwy. It makes mommy happy."
At this point, I am barely stifling the tears, but I am managing until...
Veda: "Mama, does it bweak your heart??"
Aaaaaand, the flood gates open!!
me: "Yes baby, it does break my heart. But, that's okay. It's just because I miss him. But, that's why I got the tattoo. It makes mama feel better"
Veda: "I'm sowwy mama. I wike your Siwwy tattoo."
And then a sweet kiss from my sweet girl. :)
It's amazing the things that come out of her mouth and how much she understands. I don't think I have ever even spoken to her about a broken heart, but she picked it up somewhere, and she knew exactly what it meant. And while I sat and cried because I missed my brother, I cried more because it was just another one of those moments when I was reminded that despite the every day frustrations, my little girl has the most beautiful little heart. And she knows exactly what to say exactly when I need it. Just so happens, I had spent most of the day dwelling on the fact that it has been a year and a half. And I had already met someone earlier that day who knew my brother and never knew me, and did something so beautiful for me that brought me to tears. God knows when I avoid the grieving, and avoid the thought of someone I love so much. And then, He literally puts the thoughts right in my face so that I can no longer avoid them. I am amazed daily. And I hate to brag, but I am so blessed with my amazing little Veda. At her age, she really has no idea how much her words can impact someone. But last night...in the middle of potty time...she just so happened to mend a part of my broken heart.
